ThinkLink – Mind-Activated Access to ChatGPT (Because Typing Is So 2024)
Gift type: Fake
Estimated Price: £19.99
The future is here and it's plugged directly into your brain. Introducing ThinkLink – the microchip that sits gently behind your left ear and provides uninterrupted, hands-free access to ChatGPT. Got a question? Think it. Need emotional support? Think it harder.
Powered by neural micro-impulse recognition (aka: *vibes*), ThinkLink interprets your thoughts and sends them straight to ChatGPT’s API, returning answers directly into your inner monologue. No typing, no talking, just quiet, internal sass from the cloud-based friend who never logs off.
Includes sarcasm filter, overthinking buffer, and the ability to replay embarrassing conversations in ultra HD clarity.
- Brand: SynapseWare Labs
- Dimensions: 1.2cm x 0.8cm x 0.4cm
- Materials: Biocompatible plastic, titanium connectors, metaphysical guilt
- Colour(s): Thought Grey, Cognitive Copper, Deep Overthink Blue
- Other Specifications:
- Battery-free – powered by sheer panic
- Bluetooth-adjacent (probably)
- Latency: virtually instant, unless you’re tired
- Data limit: 200 questions/day or until your brain melts, whichever comes first
Honestly? We didn’t expect to love ThinkLink this much. Within minutes of neural calibration (which is basically thinking really hard while clenching your jaw), we were having fluid mental convos with ChatGPT. It knew what we meant even when we didn’t – like “that thing with the guy and the boat” and “do cats know we name them?”
👀 Read more...We especially appreciated the internal feedback system – it gently zaps you when your question is grammatically embarrassing. The sarcasm filter struggled a bit during staff meetings (“Am I *really* the only one working?” led to a confusing TED Talk about productivity guilt), but otherwise it performed beautifully.
One team member now uses it exclusively to settle arguments silently in the pub. Another installed it upside down and now can only access medieval trivia. Still, we’re calling it a win. Stylish, unobtrusive, and perfect for introverts with too many questions and not enough courage to Google them out loud.